We had our first home visit last week. It went very well, I think. Of course I was frantic while Ted behaved as if it was just a regular day. We rushed to get our house back in order from our family reunion and garage sale. I wanted everything to be perfect and everything in its place. Well, things weren't perfect in the house, and that was ok. Our adoption specialist asked some tough questions; some we expected and some we didn't. She did a walk through of our imperfect home. Even the washroom! The place my husband swears no one will ever see so why do I insist that he clean it. Question asked and answered.
Our specialist really made us feel at ease and comfortable. But before the interview I wondered if we should temper ourselves or just be who we are. I was really more concerned about my free flowing hubby :) But I worried if they would like just regular Ted and Cher? Not the folks on paper, but the flawed people at the house. Would they deem us as appropriate parents? So while we started the home visit with our "representatives" the "real" us quickly emerged. We are who we are. We love God, we love each other. We have good and bad days and we miss the mark. A lot! But we love our lives together. We love to laugh and to share our stories of the day with one another. We comfort each other in pain and sorrow. We share old fashioned values instilled by our wonderful parents. We love worshipping together and spending quality time with family and friends. We are not perfect but we have made ourselves available to this process and to God's leading us on this path.
So does our agency approve of us? We still don't know the answer to this question. Our worker laughed a lot and she sympathized when we shared our personal tragedies and struggles. We have some major hurdles yet to jump before we know this answer. What we do know is that the real Ted and Cher will continue to show up and share our genuine desire for parenthood.
What we also know is that we need to buy a fire extinguisher, carbon monoxide detectors and to put our household chemicals in a different place. The fun never ends :)
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